as long as they’re mine

Do you ever have days that feel like they have a thread running through them; one thing stitched into another?

Last Thursday, I got to go with a couple of friends to visit another friend on her farm.

The four of us (me, Beverly, and Sandy, pictured above, plus Donna, who was taking this) sat outside over brunch in a pavilion that this family built themselves. We looked out at their piece of land: the vegetable garden, the pond, the cages of rabbits and chickens and quail. We watched the birds fly suddenly into the air, wheel and turn, and settle again.

It’s a place that lends itself to peace and long conversations. The same can be said of the people who live there. Last week, as I sat with these women (and eventually Sandy’s husband too) I thought – I am lucky to sit at this table. We talked of many things: they wanted to know about my kids’ new school, we asked questions about Sandy and Mike’s upcoming mission trip to Kenya.

Somehow, we talked about our families. The ones we were born into. I mostly listened, and as I did I was struck by how deeply we are marked by a very few people when we are young. Is there any better way, really, to get to the heart of who someone is than to hear them speak honestly about their family?

That evening, Beverly and I went to see a local production of Annie. Some friends are in the show – a couple of girls we know are playing orphans, a husband and wife playing Rooster and Celeste the maid. We laughed ourselves silly. It was great fun, just like I expected it to be. What I didn’t expect was suddenly tearing up early in the show when Annie sings about her parents, coming back for her. Maybe, she sings, voicing her wish that her parents will love her as much as she hopes, that they will come for her even today.

Somehow, that simple song laid itself over the childhood stories I’d heard earlier that day. I wrapped the ache up softly and tucked it inside my heart – hoping that for whatever reason I noticed that day, I wouldn’t soon forget. That we all long to be loved. That we all want to be part of a family.